Wednesday, May 25, 2011

Out to Lunch!

Dear Helen Hartman,
          With summer coming fast I will find myself looking at more free time in my day. I would love to be one of those ladies who lunch instead of  what I am - an eats-lunch-in -my-car lady. Where do I start?

Dear Luncheon One,
Start by getting out of your car and into a copy of
Ladies Who Lunch
by Anne Reed and Marilyn Pfaltz
(Scribner, copyright 1972)
It begins: Come to lunch is a familiar phrase in every woman’s world whether on an engraved invitation or in today’s world, a breezy telephone call…
(What about by text, or tweet, or a breezy scream at the top of their lungs over their children’s melodious screeching voices in the park?).  Maybe those ladies don’t do lunch?  Helen wonders if Lady-like lunch doing is reserved for the pampered poodle set.
(Yes a cheap ploy to show off my $2 chalkware poodle – tres chic, yes?)

The Ladies Who Lunch book divides menus into Cold Weather, Hot Weather, Formal and...

Helen suspects ‘Informal’ here might be code for “When you don’t give a hang WHAT you serve”.  You want more? Actual examples? But Helen already told you... 
 So, you think you know better than Helen, eh? All right but don’t say you haven’t been warned.

There. You’ve made Helen feel sad... about spaghetti! Contemplating thoughts of tying that book to that poodle and throwing them into a vat of another offering, easy vichyssoise. Happy Now?

No, you’re not because wanting to be something other than who you are is rarely the path to happiness.  Repeat after me: Helen Knows Best, Helen Knows Best.
Well, I said let's do lunch, I never said what I planned to do TO lunch.
        Here's a thought : Why not celebrate the ladies who do... everything?
  With a little help from this week’s find dated Sept. 1959  
Come back with me to a time when men were men and women were…  
Quietly plotting their revenge.

I can just imagine what this wife and mother is dreaming:
One day I am going to get on a plane…
                      And be ignored by a better class of man!

You know what I suspect ‘ladies’ discuss at these lunches? (they certainly are not using their mouths to eat tuna spaghetti salad!): MEN!

Starting with how much they appreciate us!
That gal of mine, she bought the bread, sliced the lunch meat, had clean plates in the cupboard, raises my children, does the laundry and sometimes
me but the real reason I keep her around?  

Give me a break! Better yet, give yourself one.
Tell that man of yours to put on his big boy pants (that YOU bought for him, sheesh, can’t these guys do anything?)  and make his own lunch.
Yes, we are judging each other based on the kind of underwear we buy for our imaginary children, but that doesn't mean we aren't the best of friends!

So, hire a sitter.
Do not mess with me. Can't you see I already kicked your sister’s butt and tossed her into the couch cushions? (actually the real caption suggests this is a DANCE lesson - First you put your two knees in their gut...)

And go have lunch with your girlfriends! 
You can do it, because you're the kind of lady who can do anything she sets her mind to do!
Hmmm, I think I'll push that dork out of that car and take it for myself, I'm late for lunch with my bffs!
Happy Rednesday over at It's A Very Cherry World 
Vintage Thingie Thursday at ColoradoLady 
and Wicked Awesome Wednesday (on Thursday) at Handy Man, Crafty Woman
also  Time Travel Thursday at Brambleberry Cottage
and Vintage Inspiration Friday at Common Ground


  1. Don't you dare go chucking that poodle in with the vichysoisse! I'll have him to go in my collection.
    There's not much choice there for me and my fellow vegetarian ladies who lunch, is there? The grapefuit and apple mold aren't really getting my juices flowing.
    Me and that Steve Buscemi lookalike would get on a right treat. xxx

  2. Oh gosh, what a funny post! I especially liked the "don't mess with me" one. What I'm taking away from this post is that now I know I have to go out to lunch today with someone, ANYONE, and that Helen Knows Best, Helen Knows Best....!
    Happy REDnesday,

  3. Hello Helen:
    Ah yes, the multi-tasking, all-singing, all-dancing women who lunch. And, with such delicious, mouthwatering food to energise them, no wonder they were capable of handling anything that life [or, perhaps, their partners] could throw at them.

    But, how marvellous it is that we lesser mortals now have you, dear Helen, to guide us through the maelstrom of life. What would, or indeed could, we do without you?

    This has been a highly amusing post. We loved it!!

  4. I got married in the 60s, and this post tempts me to wax sentimental and philosophical about women's lib and the "put on your big boy pants" attitude...but I'm still trying to wrap my head around the tuna fish spaghetti salad thing and can't quite collect my wits.

  5. OOOOH loving that poodle! Scarlett x

  6. Thanks y'all - have not quite recovered from that recipe yet!

  7. Blechy tuna spaghetti! I do need to go lunching tho'. When I lived in Louisville, I mean Loo-vulle. :) we would eat at "burritos as big as your head" that wasn't the real name but we LOVED that place. Do you know what I mean? We also got sawdust pie at a cute little diner by E-town. Oh how I miss my old Kentucky home. :)

  8. I guess it's more like loul-vulle. :)

  9. I don't think I want to be a Lady Who Does Lunch if I have the eat stewed rhubarb and tuna fish spaghetti salad! No thank you!

  10. Jori -that place is still there! I've never been but we do make a point to eat local, lunch or not.

  11. I love vintage photos and ads like these!

  12. ha ha ha you posts always make me smile. But i have to say yuk today to the recipes egg plant and clam casserole are they being serious yuk yuk yuk....not much choice for a vegetarian. I will do ladies that do lunch at another restaurant today please ;-)) dee x

  13. Vegetarians (I try but somehow I end up with a meaty portion once a week or so) - I honestly would have thought by 1972 - the copyright of the book, there would have been some "health" food options!

  14. OH MY! What a fun post...and only too true! I remember! Very neat and makes me remember some little booklets I picked up at a festival awhile back! I'll have to get them out and study them! heehee! Enjoy your day! ♥

  15. I know I can't get through the week with out a 2 hour girlfriend lunch! :)

    Cute post! :) No thanks on the tuna spaghetti though. LOL


  16. I think I just lost my appetite for dinner thinking about tuna spaghetti salad. Love the part about women plotting revenge. You sure made me laugh reading through this post. Thank you so much for visiting with me and I'm going to come back to follow just as soon as Blogger gives us back our followers:-(

  17. Oh MY - been away taking my daughter to art classes and return to find ghost followers! OOOOOoooooOOOOeeeeoOOOO

  18. Love this! So creative!
    Are these "vintage" photos? I remember these well from my youth - I guess that dates me!!

  19. Thanks Barb - they are snaps from vintage magazines or photos of vintage finds that (usually) belong to me. It dates me too but oh how I love finding an ad that I remember - such a rush of memories!

  20. HAHAHAHAheheheheehhoohoohoo...oh stop please....
    that is tooooo funny...true..sad...but funny
    I love going thru vintage mags and pulling out memories. Check out mine for this week!

  21. Thanks for following me over to visit. I couldn't find a place to email you, so I'm writing back in your comments. Yes, of course you may join my blog party even if the only thing you "make" is smart remarks, LOL! ;-) Sarcasm is my 2nd language! Almost anything goes on our blog party; your vintage photos/ads are fine, I love that stuff. Love your writing, too!

    Just no "commmercial" links (And by th mean nothing like Etsy shop links, etc.) Come join us! I have a whole mess of vintage stuff I'm planning to write about in the coming many ideas, so little time!

  22. oops, some of my writing got cut off above. I think you get the gist of what I was trying to say though! Sorry!

  23. Hilarious, but I couldn't get past the tuna spaghetti!!! Thanks for linking up with VIF'
    xo Debra

  24. Hey, I'm so glad you came over to link up to our Wicked Awesome Wednesday blog party.

  25. Sweetie, it takes practice. You start with morning coffee/playdates "For the CHILDREN" of course. If you sit there long enough they morph right into a nice ladies lunch, naturally.

    Love the blog from the kitschy background to the vintage images. Loved, Followed, Done!

    Now off to lunch ...

  26. Thanks so much for making me chuckle, Annie! It was quite fun to read the story line you built around the vintage images. ;)

    And thanks for linking to the party. I would love to have you join me each week - and the post doesn't even have to be a step back in time. Be sure to stop in later tonight, and see yourself featured.

    By the way, I just joined you as a follower. ;)

    Liz @ the Brambleberry Cottage


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