Wednesday, June 15, 2011

Helen is Such a Knotty Girl!

Dear Helen Hartman
         I promised myself I’d make something crafy to wear this summer. 
 But my sewing is so-so.  My knitting? Knauseating. And my attempts at crochet turned out cro-chite.
 Be a love, help me find a way to make something before summer is out

Dear Loved One,
        Helen has always admired those who can make clothing and accessories. Heck, Helen admires people who can WEAR clothing and accessories and not look like a walking laundry pile.  So, pull up a chair :
Estate Sale Find - a bargain price and a precious story - the seller's Mom saved this for decades, it came with her tablecloth press!
and let me introduce you to a project promised anyone can do with two easy steps.    
It looks so simple. Right?
Then tell me how in the name of all that is holey anyone went from that to this:
 Some say handicrafts are a form of therapy.
 In this case, Helen doesn’t think it is working.
I gave up macrame and just took off my pants and wrapped yarn around my legs.  I'll just sit here rocking muttering "too many knots, too many knots" now.
Yet with a little research I have to agree:
 This desire to decorate yourself with things you have made from stuff around your house. Sometimes it’s lovely.
Be-dazzling! Bling up a dress! Bead a hat! Bedeck a doll hanger then wear it as an earring.
Sometimes it’s a cry for help. (Despite the promise these require a minimum of supervision, which makes Helen hopeful, she remains doubtful they result in truly beautiful gifts)
Yes, a form to send away for a booklet for craft ideas using L'EGGS eggs! Fun for then, a holy grail of sorts for Helen now. Wait... are there suggestions combining macrame AND L'eggs eggs? That would be a craft so brilliant it just might outshine the sun.Surely a $1.95 value (and for only $1)
For most of us, it’s good just to try something new, of course. Though Helen’s husband might disagree.
Model your own damned homemade hat, that's what I shoulda said.
 Helen thinks she might try learning something else this summer – Interpretive dance, anyone?
No, she is NOT naked, and that is NOT Helen's husband but he does seem to be wearing macrame clothing, so all Helen can say is no matter how you do it: Viva La Being Knotty!
Participating in Wow Us Wednesday at the Lovely Savvy Southern Style
And Rednesday at Its A Very Cherry World. 


  1. What on earth are L'eggs eggs? Isn't that the dance troupe which used to be on Top of the Pops many moons ago?

    I have a ridiculous article in a copy of Golden Hands on how to Macrame your own sandals, right after the one on weaving your own sanitary towels...

  2. My mind is boggled by the weave your own... oh dear!

    L'eggs eggs are big plastic eggs that L'eggs pantyhose used to come in in the 1970s! They were white, blue, gold and silver, I think.

  3. love it Ms Hartman!
    thanks for clearing up the L'eggs eggs makes perfect sense now!

  4. Timely posting. Before I left for work this morning, my five year old had taken the tie of her bathrobe and had added several other ribbons onto the bathrobe tie and had it knotted around her waist. Perhaps, she was making her own interpretative macrame design? The difference...she still had clothes on underneath her "creation".

  5. I remember buying my first and last pair of L'eggs. I bought it at K Mart, got it home, and there were NO legs inside!

    Took it back, and the lady accused me of stealing the panty hose, and coming back for a second free pair. I had NOT done this, and was shocked to be accused of it!

    No more L'eggs for me, TYVM. :/ Oh last time I ever went to K mart too lol.

  6. Oh my goodness, I feel incredibly old knowing that LaKota had no idea what L'eggs were. OH MY. I remember HAVING to have them when they came out just because they came in that stupid egg packaging. Do they even make them anymore?

  7. Kim - I tell ya, its born in us to adorn ourselves by taking the ordinary and adding our own style. Let us embrace it - or make fun of it if it's on someone else with not nearly as good of taste as us!

  8. I remember wearing L'eggs support hose because they were SHINY, it was all the rage in high school.

  9. What a clever post - you are so funny! Linda

  10. I think I had that headband and that purse in 1969. :)

  11. ooohhh your posts always make me laugh out loud and today was no different what is that celtic crochet stuff about? ha ha ha ha brilliant. dee x

  12. Oh, I remember macrame...but I didn't wear it...only adorned the walls...wall hangings :)You do have a way with funny!

  13. Ah, the days of macrame - I mostly made plant hangers, don't think I made anything to wear. It was probably for the best.

    Let's see, a crafty project that Helen can do when she is done with her about going to McDonald's and getting dollar menu fries and making letters with the fries? It works with my 3 year old grandson. And then we eat them, which is the very best part. If you're game, give me a ring!


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