Wednesday, October 5, 2011

Sticker Shock!

We join a previously interrupted rant already in progress….
…and another thing, what’s the deal with those stickers?  I can’t tell you how many times I’ve had a perfectly good piece of junk ruined by a sticker that leaves a big sticky mess. I tell ya, a thing like that makes my whole day go to pot.

Boop Boop Didum Dada Waddum Choo and they swam and they swamall overthe dam.
Sorry, Helen’s mind sometimes wanders when people (other than her) go off on a tangent. What were you saying ruins junk? Pot stickers? No, that can’t be it. Those are yummy. Oh, wait, I know what you’re talking about!

Parties in a pot. I have no smart remark for that, I just had to repeat it. Ha ha. Can you guess what year this book was published?

You definitely sound like someone stuck something in your fondue pot. Relax. That’s what they’re supposed to do. 
Fire. Friends with sharp pointy sticks, what could go wrong? Nothing. That's why Helen took the initiative to invite a few people over. To YOUR house. Yes. Tonight. Go on, get ready your guests will be here any minute!

Drinking cheap wine from a bowl with a big spoon isn't going to fool anyone.  C'mon, you can do this. Fondue is fun!

 Welcome to the 70s! It’s not just a part of history, it’s a whole kind of party attitude! Start with a groovy tablescape... (perfect for joining Tablescape Thursday at Between Naps on the Porch and for Time Travel Thursday!)

A whole table full of fab thrifty treasures - It all started with a $2 fondue pot at an estate sale and then I needed matching plates - also $2 for the whole set (!) then the desert cups. Burnt orange bowls, (Target). A placemat and T-towel turned into napkins (all from Kroger), vintage fondue book circa 1970, and...
Special glassware. You have to have it. It's the only way to be cool the way the people in commercials are, unless you have...
Acrylic grapes? Not JUST acrylic grapes... look closely... is that? YES! ELECTRIC ACRYLIC GRAPES! I swear if I ever find those GO GO Boots I'm looking for, I am going to start a garage band and name it that. Until then, you can just stare into the grapes and groove along with the glow! 
Okay, the table is set, your attitude is as mellow yellow as my electric grapes. You have poured your wine out of the sauce bowl and into a coffee cup like a civilized human being. You've cut up bread and fruit and if you are wise, any photos of yourself from the 70s. You've melted the cheese and the chocolate and now you are ready for...

Hold it right there. 
You did NOT seriously think you were ready to open the door to the kind of people who would show up at your house at a moment's notice for the promise of something they can eat out of  $2 pot, did you? Not until you read:
Essential Fondue Ettiquette 
Helen Hartman’s Helpful List of Fondue’s Fond-don’ts
1. Don’t let them limit you to one fork. Take two. One to spear fruit, meat and bread with and one to stab any ill-mannered yahoos who elbow their way between you and the fondue pot of yummy goodness.

Hello. I am Diego Montoya. You ate my bread cube. Prepare to die.
2. Don’t get caught double dipping. If someone sees you do it just shout, “Is that Dr, Johnny Fever?” While all heads turn to get a glimpse of the iconic WKRP in Cincinnati character, simply slide the offending slobber slurped piece into the melted mixture incriminating teeth marks and all. 

You have a problem with the Doctor, fellow babies? Okay, I get that, but so far I've mentioned the 70s, cheesiness and rock and roll, my mind just went that way.
3. Don’t push your date’s face into the pot of fondue goo the first time he says something stupid or sexist. Wait until everyone is served -- then push his face in. It' just basic good manners.
If you ever make that joke about cutting the cheese again, you will be cutting cheese our of your eyebrows, got it?
4. Don’t invite guests with the promise of a big Fondue-Do or you may end up with a whole lot of food and no one to share it. Wait, maybe that isn't such a bad idea.

"Looks like it's you and me... on the floor...  badly dressed... draining bottle after bottle of wine while the fondue congeals."      "In other words, just another Monday."

5. Don’t be afraid to have fun. Even at the expense of others. Really, you have a pot full of cheese and croutons on sticks, unless you’ve brought in great entertainment - and Helen is busy tonight practicing tambourine for her about to be formed band -  what are you going to do?
 No Johnny Fever. No electric grapes. Only one danged fork and the only guy making jokes had to leave early to buy his girlfriend flowers. This is the worst party ever.
There you have it - all the makings of the perfect fondue fun doings!
Here's to the 70s - grab your pot and join the fun! (Sorry I had to go there - look at this illustration from Fabulous Fondue cookbook. Really, what else could I do?)

Oh, all right. I know the rant was about price stickers and how they can leave a mark or even damage things that have, pre-sticker, survived decades. But even Helen can't figure out why people do that. Eating delicious food in a fun new way while enjoying the electric groove of plugged in grapes? That is gold, harvest gold, to be precise and  THAT, Helen gets.

Love to know If you have any suggestions for de-gumming sticker gunk on good junk, if you have a fondue recipe or what you’d name your garage band, because Helen and The Electric Acrylic Grapes is taken.

Joining some Friday fun 
Inspiration Friday at At The Picket Fence
Vintage Inspiration Friday at Common Ground
Fridays unfolded at Stuff and Nonsense

Still having issues with the Like Button for Facebook - here's the link. Yes, it's the polite thing to do. Oh, and don't forget, Helen has a pointy fondue stick


  1. I'm going to be laughing about Fondue-Do for the rest of the night. And I actually can give you a fantastic recipe for a fondue dipper for fruit and cake. I gave my share of fondue parties in the 70s. :)

  2. You know I normally spend a good 15 min trying to get off those blasted stickers with my nail or a knife some dish soap and warm water. *AHHHH it's HELL*

    As for fondue I want to have lots of fondue parties. Last summer I purchased a lovely red and white pot and I have two sets of sticks I also have a very good fondue recipe book. But you know I did not feel I was ready yet. And that is because I DID NOT HAVE the acrylic grapes. But I did get them a couple weeks back (posted a picture of them in a post) Mine are red. =D Now I feel as though I am ready. Maybe I will invite Grandma over and have a real party.

  3. Dear lord, those electric grapes are just fantastic!
    I've never had fondue, there's always a fondue set at every car boot and charity shop I've ever been to so maybe I should.
    Nail varnish remover is the way to go to remove those pesky stickers unless it's a plastic item when you'll need an acetone-free variety! x

  4. Lovin' those groovy grapes! I've never had fondue, but I do believe I had the pot at one point:@)

  5. Dana - have never had fondue. The phase passed me by - but ready to try it now!

  6. A red fondue pot and red grapes - it's meant to be!

  7. Vix - thanks - my "new" fondue pot looks totally unused. From the reports here it sounds like lots of folks had fondue pots but no fondue! Thanks for the sticker tip.

  8. I can remember back when we first were married my husband and I would have fondue with our best friends every New Years! Where is that pot...I do still have it!

  9. ELECTRIC ACRYLIC GRAPES! Absolutely divine!!! I love fondue. I even have a Peanuts fondue cookbook. I loathe sticker issues too. Vegetable oil sometime helps.

  10. Thanks Ann and Kim - every reply makes me want to try fondue more and more.

  11. Oh, what a chuckle! We had a fondue pot ... used it a couple times & poof! the craze was over back in the 70s. Wasn't all that keen on it unless it had chocolate in it anyway.

    TTFN ~
    Have a beautiful weekend ~

  12. I love fondue! My parents used to have fondue parties all the time and I used to think it was amazing when i was young. Scarlett x

  13. Actually, Citrus Magic (sold at antique malls/flea markets) made a great adhesive remover....wouldn't you know they discontinued it! :(

  14. Scarlett - my parents had cocktail parties, twist parties, holiday parties, I guess by the time fondue came around they were too exhausted to try it.

    Sherry - that's the way it usually goes!

  15. Groovy baby, grooooovy! We love fondue at our fact every other month we have fondue night (kids prefer the chocolate type overall!) ALTHOUGH, it won't be the same until I get some grapes...THAT makes the party - I see where I've gone wrong :) lol!!

    BTW - Goo Gone is our favorite thing to take stickers and such off at the store - squirt or spray it on and let it sit - then the sticker usually just lifts off. Doesn't hurt the finish of things either - hope it helps ya out!

  16. Thanks! Have heard about Goo Gone but never remember to get it until I need it and then nowhere near a store.
    Yes the grapes are making my whole life better. Who knew? For one thing, they scare the cat. So when I want her to stay off a surface... they are like, magic!

  17. Well I've seen a LOT (waaay too many!) acrylic grapes in my time but NEVER acrylic grapes that light up! I may have to put those at the top of my "most sought after" list of things to find! Oh yes, definately a conversation piece & wouldn't you know, Dear Helen would be the first on the block to showcase such an item! Anyway, YES! Goo-Gone is THE way to remove stickers - I keep at least a gallon of it on hand at all times. But here's my gripe Dear Helen - the thrift store that uses a black marker. Now usually this black marker rinses right off - in fact if you carry the item around too long it invaribly comes off on your hand. But they also put it on the botton of pourous items like an adorable figurine or a pretty pottery piece and THAT is the end of that - forever marked. BTW, GREAT fondue party!

  18. That table was awesome. Love those plates and THOSE GRAPES! That was a total score. I've never seen them lit before. Really pretty. What a great party idea:)

  19. Vickie - oh my, haven't come across the curse of the black marker! Another check in the box for Good Gone. I never see these grapes but we had 'em growing up and they were pink - would love that color.

  20. Welcome Farmgirl - I can't say for sure this isn't a homemade light though if it is it was done by a perfectionist! Anyway - tip to anyone who has/finds these grapes, the light didn't shine through to the last grape so I snuck a faux battery powered tea light under the grapes on the end - you could do that under non electric ones and get the same effect!

  21. I have good and bad memories of the 1970s. Fondue is definitely one of the good memories, as are "WKRP in Cincinatti", the Bee Gees, "Saturday Night Fever", "Dallas", disco dancing and gaucho pants. (Yes...I actually LIKED gaucho pants!!!) Your table really captures the look and mood of the 70s! Fun theme!

  22. Ah...the 70s. I have an avocado green fondue languishes SOMEWHERE. Love your electric grapes. My sister has a glass pineapple lamp made of similar grape-like things. She loves it. Your post is sooooooooooo funny. I will be back!!

  23. Lighter fluid works like a charm to remove stickers. Works well for stickers on paper items. Does NOT stain or otherwise discolor the paper item.

  24. Goodwill and our other favorite stores just WILL stick the sticker dead center on the back of china and other flat things, obscuring the maker-mark.

    I've been known to pick or peel it off, just with one tee-ninecy corner adhering, just to see if it's Homer Laughlin or four-in-a-WalMart box.

    And I think (thankfully) that Goodwill has been buying their stickers from the same source for the last twenty years, for they're a nice paper kind. I lay everything face down on the counter, put a squdged-up piece of paper towel right over the sticker, and go around amongst them all, pouring a little water on to get them really wet.

    In the morning, they just slide right off.

    Peanut butter is my sovereign remover for front glasses of picture frames, though I've heard that WD-40 is quite the thing, as well. Just be careful where the spray goes, for it could take the finish off the frame or leak through onto the picture beneath.

    My fondue pot is the black sheep of 70s colors---Harvest Gold and Avocado were the chosen kids, and my cloudy turquoise is sorta the outsider.

  25. Oh my gosh, this takes me back 40 years, except my fondue pot was avocado! What a great table...thanks for the memories.

  26. Can I be in your band if I bring my own grapes?


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