Wednesday, November 9, 2011

I'm Ba-a-a-ack. Kinda.

Dear Helen Hartman,
You always seem to learn something worth passing along from every experience. Love to hear any pearls of wisdom gleaned from your time dwelling the valley of the unwell?

Dear Loved One
Well, I am still kinda limping along the slippery slopping side of the valley of the unwell but I do think I’m heading away from the abyss of the undead.



Who'd have thought that one day I'd take "You look marginally less awful than a freshly reanimated corpse" as a compliment?
What I learned? 
1)I learned there is a fine line between trying not to be an over-reactor and trying not to meet the undertaker. 

Don't be a hero - take care of yourself! I may buy this sign and stick it up on my desk at work at the first sneeze.
2) You know all those dvds, photos, bookmarked websites, books, whatever that you have stashed away thinking –one day I will be sick and spend a week catching up on these? You are fooling yourself. I know you, you're just like me (or at least you WANT to be - who doesn't?). You will do what the rest of us do, lay around like a speed bump watching mind numbing TV and whining for people to come rescue you if you so much as drop the remote.
Is there a how to eat soup edition? How about a Learn to Give a Look So Pathetic That Someone Will Bring You Tea and Rub Your Feet? I really could have used one of those.

3)  Push yourself when you can . (get dressed, get fresh air, move around.) 

In a weird burst of energy I went shopping for black pants but came home with a hokey fake fireplace (on at this moment, adoring it) and a Dutch Oven. No pants. (More on that another time but be on notice, retail world, you are in Helen's sights.)
4) Pamper yourself when you can’t. (do any of those things)

A family heirloom - this was the mug my mom was allowed to drink from only when she was sick.
(btw this is how I felt, like a pale little froggie stuck in a mug)

 5) I learned the Universe doesn’t understand how it’s supposed to work. 
For your information, Universe, when someone is as sick as I am he/she can at least expect to Lose Weight! Even if it doesn't last we crave that satisfaction of getting on the scale and seeing....Not even an ounce? Not funny.
 
6) And most of all to trust your gut (even when it is acting MOST untrustworthy) but listen to people who care about you. (people told me day one to go to the dr. I didn’t go until 5 days in. I suspect if I had waited a few more days I’d have been in the hospital or worse).

Isn't she so pretty? No clever caption just --
 Thanks for all the love and support and kinds words - planning to join Pink Saturday and hope to be back bossing around the Universe (and those jerks who are in charge of women's fashion in department stores - oh, they are on my list. On my list Indeed).



And in the end, do something nice for the people who helped you get through when you are better. They deserve it.  I think mine deserve a break from me so maybe I’ll go some place sunny and warm for the weekend. It’s the least I can do for my loved ones, right?

20 comments:

  1. Glad you're feeling a little better! Sounds kinda scary though... take care of yourself, black's not going out of style:@)

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  2. So glad you are feeling better, and well enough to share your wonderful sense of humor. By the way, I think I have that same "Learn How Book".

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  3. Thanks y'all!
    Not sure I learned how to do anything from that book, but the pics make me smile

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  4. You poor poor thing. You and your advice were missed.

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  5. Yep, go take a sunny nap somewhere and take better care of you! And be glad you have someone else to do it when you cant:)

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  6. So glad to hear you feel a bit better. Being poorly is horrible and we are our own worst enemy at times. Hope you manage to get a bit of sun and start to feel more like your old self very soon. take lots of care, dee xx

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  7. Hello Helen:
    How wonderful it was to see you appearing in our Google Reader!!! The Blogosphere is not the same without you and we have been making some hideous faux pas without recourse to your marvellous advice.

    Yes, a weekend away, what a wonderful idea. You deserve it......and, perhaps, just the teeniest of Martinis will soon be passing your lips!!! Take great care!!

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  8. Sounds like you have been very ill indeed! But I have to say (and I'm sure Helen would approve of my flat, dismissive, Aussie tone)- that frog mug is feral, but I bet you don't look as bad as he does. Get well soon.xxxxxxx.

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  9. Thank you for the smiles, y'all.

    Jane and Lance - hmmm, well, maybe by the weekend I will be off meds and can manage to, you know, choke down a sip

    LOL KItty! That mug used to scare me as a kid.

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  10. So glad to see you back in the world of the living. My Grandma had a Victorian version of that frog mug, isn't it horrid? x

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  11. So glad you're better. I was getting worried about you! Of course, I had to quit feeling sorry for myself for being sick when you got sicker...but I forgive you. I probably got enough mileage out of it anyway. :)

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  12. I've been gone, so I did not know you were gone! Glad you're feeling better enough to be sassy!

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  13. Vix- it is much worse in person isn't it?

    Aw, Dana- sorry to steal your thunder - you have to learn the art of making a way bigger deal out of stuff than everyone else!

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  14. Sorry to hear you've been ill, here's to feeling better soon. I must admit I love that frog mug! Thats totally my sense of humour, i really need one of those next time im stuck doing to tea run at work mwahaha! Scarlett x

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  15. My kids love that mug, too. I've never had the nerve to drink out of it.

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  16. Helen, so sorry you were sick. Nothing worse than feeling like death warmed over. And the fact that you didn't even get to lose weight! I agree, that's adding insult to injury.I just bought one of those hokey fake fireplaces for my daughter. She loves it too! Gives off some much needed heat on demand.

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  17. Glad you are on the mend! Have a nice, restful weekend. :)

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  18. oh, you know we just HATE that you've been sick! Get it out of your system so that you can concentrate on all of the holiday junk food coming up - ya....that's right!! At least you still have your sence of humor :P

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  19. Thanks Rose and Karen and 'Girls' - feeling stronger every day.

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  20. I'm glad you are feeling better! I know it didn't seem very humorous at the time...but we're laughing now! And you're sure we want read the stack of magazines we've saved...or lose any weight! It hardly seems worth getting sick! Hugs to you, my friend! ♥

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