Monday, January 23, 2012

One Day Soon...

Dear Helen Hartman,
I swear, one day I am going to get it all right. Eating, exercising, the mommy thing, the taking time for myself thing, the work thing. All figured out. I tell myself this all the time but that magical day never arrives and each night I fall into bed knowing that in most everything else I’ve fallen short. I will love you forever if you can tell me – how do I finally get my ducks in a row so I can stop wishing for one day and finally get myself together?

Dear Loved One,
The last time Helen had all her ducks in a row she was pulling them along behind her with a string!

Mine. Yes, it's old. But it's still cute and fun. Remind you of anyone? Quack.



Sweetie, there is no ‘one day’ when everything will be the way you dream it should be. There is only THIS day and what you make of it.

Dotty knew that the best things in life were sometimes just beyond your reach. That's why she always carried straws.
One of the benefits of aging is: 

Wearing ridiculous clothes and saying things like - hey wanna polish my pole?

 (Oh, James Beard, why... why?)
No. 

 
Speaking your mind whenever you want and seasoning it with salty language and everyone accepting it because they think you're just a quirky old fart?


Elda spent her days pouring over the Dictionary of Urban Slang highlighting new words to use to shock others and amuse herself.  "Oh, my, that's a humdinger. "
No.
Watching your jawline, neck, boobs and butt all head south and taking bets on which one reaches your cankles first?

The plastic surgeon took one look at me and said it would be cheaper to just hire someone to walk behind me pulling up the sagging parts than to get it all tucked and lifted.

 Cut it out.

The ‘gift’ of getting older is looking back on the threads of your life and seeing that the things you thought were tangles and knots and missed stitches only made the pattern more interesting.


A sampling of barckcloth drapery that proves beauty is in the eye, and on the curtain rod, of the beholder.

Getting it all together is overrated.Where would you put it? How long would it take you to catalog it? Could you ever find it again once you did?

Label guns don't kill people. People kill people who use label guns. Then they label them.
Even the keenest modern container solutions can’t keep joy fresh.

I know stuff isn't supposed to make you happy. But these Tupperware desert dishes make me smile every time. Are they vintage? Not sure but they were a special find for me.
You gotta use JOY up as you find it. 
Honestly, Helen hates to burst your bubble.
You mean, serving macaroni is NOT like wearing mink? What else? Cleaning toilets is NOT like being a pretty, pretty mermaid princess with magical flushing powers?
But unless you are a Muppet (I LOVED that movie)that 'One Day When Everything is Just The Way it Should Be But Stays That Way From Now On' is not gonna happen. But you know what IS happening?
 Party at Helen's house?


They CAN be... until Patty Party Pooper shows up and starts turning on lights and turning off the Pat Boone records.
This Day.  Participate in it and if you find yourself feeling you’ve fallen short, forgive yourself. You’re only human.

You're only human. For some it's an excuse. For Cats it's an accusation.
It’s Chinese New Year, too. Find something good in it.

If I don't actually work all that hard, do I still get a partial pay off?
 Have a great week, find lots of good stuff - in thrift stores, in others and in yourself. It's there, just waiting for you to make the most of this day.

joining Nifty Thrift Tuesday at Coastal Charm 
and Anything Goes at Type A 
Rednesday at A Very Cherry World
and Share the Love Wednesday at Very Merry Vintage Style
and Cozy Home Party at Cozy Home Scenes

63 comments:

  1. So enjoy your vintage pics - I have mentioned you as one of my 2011 favorite blogs!
    http://thriftshopcommando.blogspot.com/2012/01/blog-addict-my-top-10-favorites-for.html

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Wow - thanks! I'll be sure to share via FB to send people to visit your blog.

      Delete
  2. Hehehe, this had me laughing hard. Yay for getting old and im totally wishing that one day i'll get to use the phrase "wanna polish my pole"! Scarlett x

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. You may regret that because you're so cute someone will take ya up on it!

      Delete
  3. Absolutely! Celebrate this day, and savor the time with family and friends. Before you know it, the little ones aren't little anymore.

    Gonna have to try that Creamettes macaroni thing. Imagine that, mink! Who knew?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hey, I'm all for a cheap thrill, Karen. Why not?

      Delete
  4. Replies
    1. Coming from someone who's blog always makes my day, that means a lot!

      Delete
  5. I kinda like the idea of combining the Urban Dictionary thing with wearing ridiculous clothes and saying whatever is on my mind. I think it will up the shock value considerably. I promised I wouldn't start doing that till I hit 65...but I'm at 17 months and counting, so beware! :)

    Seriously, the nicest thing about getting older is realizing that the invisible "they" (You know, the ones who try to dictate our behavior and make us feel guilty if we don't measure up) don't have any more answers about life than I do. If we spend each new day concentrating on being the best person we can be and making the best choices that present themselves to us, then, by extension, we've been the best spouse, the best mother, the best employee and the best friend we can be. At the end of the day, who can ask for more?

    ReplyDelete
  6. Lovin' the cute Tupperware dishes too! About that Creamettes thing... let's just say I'm skeptical:@)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. What happened to my reply I made the other day? Did it disappear? Well, I did say I was going to go get macaroni and try it out. Oh, blogger, you baffle me almost as much as vintage advertising.

      Delete
  7. Lol...sooo funny...you are so much fun, I needed the laughs! Thanks!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thanks so much for coming by - everyone can use a laugh now and then, right? I always enjoy your blog.

      Delete
  8. This comment has been removed by the author.

    ReplyDelete
  9. You got it Helen! The older I get, the easier it is to excuse and forgive myself...now that's joyful! Love your "ducks all in a row", and thanks for the smiles!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Maybe that's why little old ladies get up to so much mischief!

      Delete
  10. Oh the little duck pull toy is so charming!
    That guys apron gave me a real good laugh. (I was like... WHAT THE HELL?!)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I KNOW! It was a full page of James Beard in what were supposed to be masculine barbeque aprons - they were all like this one. What were they thinking?

      Delete
  11. Enjoy and embrace each day is what we should always say to ourselves i think, that way we would all be a lot more happy. Love those containers those are lovely. Enjoy your week, dee x

    ReplyDelete
  12. Good advice. Have a lovely week Dee.

    ReplyDelete
  13. What spectacularly good advice! I love all of your lovely pics too. Sarah xxx

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thanks for visiting. Love spending time on your blog as well.

      Delete
  14. What a great read! Glad I ventured over from AW! Can you say bookmarked! Have a great week :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thanks Alan - I try to read as many AWers as possible.

      Delete
  15. This is my first time to see your blog although I've seen some of your witty comments on other blogs. You are a very creative and funny person. I don't know if the Tupperware bowls are vintage or brand new but they are vert cute and useful for storing a variety of food and stuff. I would love to have you share something even like the Tupperware at my Your Cozy Home Party. I think it would be great to spread your good humor to as many places in this worl as is possible. Join us today if you can. The party runs until Thursday night so come whenever it's convenient.--------- Shannon

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you for the invite Shannon - I will be sure to drop by!

      Delete
  16. You are hilarious amor!
    polish my pole, Hahaayyy!!
    besios

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. It's not a pretty job but somebody has to do it.

      Delete
  17. What a cute blog! Love this post! My ducks are never in a row...they are circling around me. Aso, thank you for the visit and the sweet comment @TheDedicatedHouse. It means the world. Hope you're having a grand day! Toodles, Kathryn @TheDedicatedHouse

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you for coming over. I do enjoy your blog.

      Delete
  18. Great advice. You always find the best stuff to mix into wisdom-filled anecdotes. Darling pastel Tupperware dishes.

    ReplyDelete
  19. I bought the dishes at a thrift store with plans for a neice's tea party but we didn't get to use them yet! I like just looking at them.

    ReplyDelete
  20. Visting from the Cozy Home Party, and the Tupperware bowls brought a smile. Not sure if they are vintage, but the pastel colors are charming.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Aren't they? They are translucent. I am sooo happy to know there are people out there who get the love of thrifty finds!

      Delete
  21. Thanks so much for coming to the party. I hope lots of people get to read your post which is so funny and yet filled with such truth. It looks like you draw a pretty good audience on your own so I am flattered that you stopped by. Please try to come next week, I would love that. Thanks again!----- Shannon

    ReplyDelete
  22. Been lovin' your blog for a while now and think it's great. I've been enjoying the humor and especially the vintage pics, but just realized there's good advice in there! This one is exceptional! I'll be reading closer from now on. Thanks!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Well, I DO try to boss around as many people as possible, sometimes that means you actually have to use common sense and encouragement. Of course, I get it back ten fold in interacting with everyone.

      Delete
  23. Oh Helen/Annie. You always make me smile and I, too, always find the wisdom buried in there between the polishing of the poles and the accusations of the cat. The fabric of life is a beautiful one even though all we may see at one time is a wrinkled string weaving its way through an undulating web of tangled cross threads. Thank you for the reminder. And for loving the Muppets. Yes, loving the Muppets.

    ReplyDelete
  24. Gwen if you need a day lifter you should see the current movie. I have the song - Life's a Happy Song on my ipod for emergencies. Love to see you out and about.

    ReplyDelete
  25. Brilliant! I must say reading your funny blog posts is almost akin to the feeling I get when I serve up a macaroni salad. Whilst in fur, of course. ;-)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I bet you're wearing your mink stole right now - so where's the macaroni?

      Delete
  26. Love your blog, thanks so much for the giggles!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thanks for stopping by - I enjoyed visiting your blog right back!

      Delete
  27. Heeehehhee, girl ya crack me up and give me a ray of sunshine on this dreary rainy day!

    I had duck in a row like that. Once...many, many moons ago!

    Now, all my 'ducks' are flyin' south! :o)

    Have a magnificently blessed day dear Helen!

    ReplyDelete
  28. Ducks....I had ducks in a row. Oops!!!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. LOL - ya know I'd be amazing if I could get a long duck in a row these days. Have a blessed day as well.

      Delete
    2. IT would be amazing. I think typos must be catching!

      Delete
  29. I love everything about this post! You crack me up, every time!!
    (popping over from Rednesday)

    ReplyDelete
  30. You had me at the "pole" comment. Love your blog!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thanks! I love yours, especially the title. It's so relatable.

      Delete
  31. In case no one's mentioned it yet, the Tupperware is vintage. I remember eating jello and pudding from these!

    ReplyDelete
  32. I love your blog! I’m from Northern Kentucky so Louisville is a good day trip for me. I’m going to visit the crazy daisy someday soon.

    Cindy

    ReplyDelete
  33. Fun fun fun! Could we just hang out together some time? You could go to my favorite thrift store with me tomorrow! I'll pick you up....I wish! Enjoy your weekend! ♥

    ReplyDelete
  34. Great post! Yep, find joy in today and make the best of what you have... I agree whole heartedly (and with a giggle as always at your great writing)Have a great weekend & thanks for the link up !
    Mary

    ReplyDelete
  35. I just love this stuff...I wonder? Is it too soon for me to be the little odl lady who say what she will?

    ReplyDelete

Loved To Have Their Own Say In Things Ones say:

LinkWithin

Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...