Dear Helen Hartman,
It’s Halloween and there is something I would love to know. So give us a treat and do tell – what do you find spoooooooky?
Dear Loved-– BOO!
Did that scare you?
|Can't scare ME. I have kids.|
Come now, really? Helen afraid of ghosties and ghoulies and things that go bump in the night?
|Those creeps should be scared of Helen|
Honestly, Loved Ones, Helen did once live in a real live haunted house!
|We've talked it over and think that should be a real undead haunted house.|
It was when we were expecting our first child and we rented a house that our new kitty couldn’t quite settle into. He would be walking along and suddenly he’d arch his back and his hair would go up and he’d stare and hiss at nothing. Sometimes the whole house would be filled with the smell of fish frying and we couldn’t figure out why.
|Think back, could it have been because Gene Tierney was paying you a visit?|
A lot of little things went on but nothing too frightening until we started to turn the front bedroom into a nursery. Then the whole feel of the place changed. Literally.
That room went ice cold and nothing could warm it. That’s when the neighbors told us that the house had been owned by… Mr. Jefferies!
|Holy crap on a cracker! Not MR JEFFRIES!|
He lived alone after his wife died, loved to fish and never had children. And it seemed he wanted his house to stay child free. We moved soon after. How about YOU, Loved Ones? Have you ever played host to a ghost?
|FYI The Ghost of Christmas Past doesn't count.|
Let me leave you with some advice for Trick or Treat
On Halloween: FINE
|Trick or Treat Smell my Feet, Give me something good to eat. Helen as Tinkerbelle - the later years when she is a waitress at the Hungry Croc|
Rest of the year: Busting into strangers homes demanding they smell your feet is grounds for a restraining order.
And remember - if Life gives you lemons, make lemonade but if the neighbor gives you crummy candy, make your sister eat it.