Friday, January 25, 2013

Who Do You Think You ARE?


Loved Ones today Helen is going to seize this forum today to address something that’s on her mind.

So, like EVERY post, right?
 I mean Helen even uses furniture her own way.
Comfy chairs? They're for sissies who don't have cute boots to admire.


If I were writing to myself it might go something like:

Dear wise, witty and wonderful, all knowing, all seeing Helen... well, you get it.

Sorry, got carried away. It would be a question about handling rejection. As a writer I have had plenty of it but yesterday when an editor passed on a series of books set in 1965 where in Helen Hartman spins a cautionary tale around the romantic adventures of Samantha Anthem (madcap media heiress) and Joe Fellows (ex-Marine/ surfer dude/photo journalist) (be honest, you already want to read these books, don’t you?) it just took the wind out of me.

The wind out of you?
I
hope you didn’t blame it on the dog

I was ready to shut down the blog, Let Helen do a face plant on FaceBook and give up on what felt like a failed writing career. Before that I thought I’d do what any intelligent person would -

Dear Helen Hartman,
My work is a drag. I am at the bottom of the food chain - paid the least, no benefits and get blamed for everything that goes wrong. Looking for another job but so far, nothing. The one ray of hope I had, that I’d get a book deal and could quit my job, has fallen through. I’d love to know how to keep going when you feel so trapped.

Dear Loved and Sometimes Wants To Smack on the Head One,
As always Helen sees through your ploy for sympathy and to the heart of the matter. It’s not about rejection, it’s about the wish to be rescued. You are upset because someone has denied you what you see as the easy way out of a bad spot. Leaving Helen to ask: Who do you think you are?




Snow White? On what planet? No, my dear, You are a princess of a different color.

Just because I'm lovely do not make the mistake of thinking
that if you mess with me and mine I won't bury your little butt in the back yard
under Mama's bougainvilleas.

That’s right. You need to step away from the wishing well, wake your own self up, pull down your mama’s portieres and make yourself an outfit, grab yourself a turnip and as God is your witness never let someone else decide if you are good enough again. Today is the day you need to start channeling your inner Scarlett.



The day you stop looking for someone else to save you is the day you decide whether to eat the poison apple, crawl into a glass coffin and let life pass you by or get busy with the work of saving yourself.

You know you can do this, you once served the whole dang Junior League using flower pots and tablescraps and made it look like a planned affair.

I am not sure how this will look.

But then people weren't sure how kitchen carpet would look.
If they had any sense, they might have figured out - great for a week, nasty ever after.
But did that stop them from going to Sears and ordering some?


But that’s what I am going to do (not install kitchen carpet, I still have some dignity left). I am going to regroup and get to work -- I have more books to write and less crap to take.

Have  Great Weekend!

joining Pink Saturday, as always!

51 comments:

  1. DON'T give up! There is more than one publisher in the world! (there "are" more? shit, hate grammar)

    If you never do anything but this blog, you have it made. You make me laugh every single day and I tell you, sometimes it's the only laugh I have. You have a gift - don't EVER give it up. Somewhere, someday, payment will come.

    From your biggest fan,
    barbara

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    1. I LOVE your new profile pic! Thanks for the kinds words. Do you think I can print out your promise that someday payment will come and send it the mortgage company? That would be super cool ;)

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  2. Many famous authors received enough rejection letters to paper a wall, so if you're not going to install kitchen carpet, use your rejection slips as wallpaper so when you make it big, you can take a picture of it to send to all the losers who didn't sign you. Yeah, that's right. Rub their faces in it!

    I agree with Barbara. I doubt that you have any idea how much your blog means to people. I had one reader tell me that she leaves her smart phone on the bedside table at night so she can read my blog post before she gets out of bed in the morning. If even one person feels that way about my blog about furniture, imagine how many hundreds of people feel that way about yours, which truly brings a smile to each and every one of your followers every time they check in to read Helen's latest advice.

    Keep writing...books, blogs, grocery lists...it doesn't matter. Just don't stop.

    ReplyDelete
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    1. Awww, that is so sweet. Honestly, I didn't write this to fish for these nice thoughts but that makes them all the sweeter. That is such a great story about the reader of your blog - I can see why, I always learn so much from your posts.

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    2. I agree with Dana. I am sure that somewhere out there, someone will appreciate your writing!

      My PINK
      Have a great weekend!

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  3. Amen! Will it help if I say that they're idiots? Probably not but you have the right idea anyway. I only recently discovered you but am already hooked even though I couldn't quite figure out what you were. Still working on that but enjoying it every day.

    Fifteen years ago I had one short story and one article published and then you can guess what I did next...started writing books, of course. Why waste time with the small stuff. So over the years I've written 3 books and now writing a family saga. Any been published? After being rejected by one agent each time, they went on a shelf and I started more. Unless someone magically comes knocking on my door after reading my mind, they won't get published. Please, don't do as I did!

    My excuse is that I grew older and more timid about actually even having to promote a book if it were accepted so I've settled for the happiness of just writing. You, however, are a different girl. I can tell. So keep on keeping on.

    Dewena

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  4. Dewana - great name! You know it's not too late to get your books out and readers finding them. You can self pub ebook these days pretty easily. I've actually been an author for a lot of years and have done this with some of my backlist. I just had hoped to get a new lease on my career with a new contract.

    Am laughing at not being able to figure out what I am - that is the story of my life. Not who am I but WHAT am I?

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    1. Well, now, if I had only made my screen large when looking at your blog I would have guessed that you had been published! That'll learn me. So I guess it's not always smooth sailing once you're published? What a fickle publishing world it is today then. Well, whatever it is you were trying to renegotiate, I hope it works out or something even better. All I know is that I haven't come across another blog like yours and I'm loving it, even reading all the fine print in the picture captions, no mean feat for these old eyes of mine, but worth it, delightful Helen Hartman.

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  5. I'm looking at the comments already and you've gotten some great advice! You know we are forever your biggest FAN CLUB...right here and right now! My hubby and I BOTH read everything you write! Hope that makes you feel a teensy bit better. I'll send extra HUGS, too!

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    1. Aww, that's so sweet. I actually feel pretty good, it's just never fun to be told "no" unless you're asking one of your kids if they need money ;)

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  6. What they all said plus my two cents:

    Don't you dare give up! You are a fantastic writer...you make me smile each time I come here...and your determination (plus wit and all-around fabulousness) helps me keep going. I am known for my excellent taste...at least by those I've informed of it...and *I* say a publisher who doesn't recognise the quality of your writing doesn't deserve you. There are others out there so keep going and I'll cheerlead.

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    1. Thanks - you do have the best taste in blogs, starting with what you put in your own! I bet most editors would say they don't 'deserve' me but it would have been nice if someone had taken on the challenge!

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    2. Just remember the lovely Madeleine L'Engle whose classic A Wrinkle In Time went through 47...that's right Forty Seven!...rejections before it was finally picked up. Oh, and the first stage of the colour transformation is up.

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  7. I didn't realize what a delicate wisp of a flower you are!

    HA! You are only going through the required WHINE stage (which if it involves real WINE can be therapeutic and FUN!) Eat a whole chocolate cake by yourself, finish off the Merlot, then you'll be back to your normal self - ready to conquer the book world. I'll buy the first copy! (at a discount for being a loyal blog reader, of course!).

    Bless your heart!

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    1. Of course! I opted for Krispy Kremes instead of chocolate. It did help.

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  8. Bummer, but I know you'll pull through ok! That's why God invented strong drinks and... big hair! Yea, big hair-big attitude! Or is that just a Mid-Atlantic thing??? Have a good weekend:@)

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    1. If you hair is big enough you can hide your strong drink flask in it!

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  9. Dammit!!! That editor has wrecked my day!!!!!!! I'm in dire need of a new book series to dive into and that cow has denied me my god-given right to read - grrrrrrrrrrrrrrr!!! Please keep trying, because I want to waltz into a bookshop and say in a very, very loud stage whisper "Oh do you have xxx book, I can't get hold of my friend the author because she's on a madcap signing tour". xoxoxo

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    1. LOL _ I DO so want to go on a madcap booksigning tour. Do you think I can just walk into a bookstore and sign random books?

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  10. Hey - WE all love your writing! That's why we visit every day. Don't you hear all those well driven authors who have said sometimes they distributed to dozens upon dozens sometimes before someone actually liked or believed in their writing/project?! Keep on Dear Helen. Isn't there always e-publishing too?I think you can make a forum for the book and offer it for download - just like online classes,etc. I think people would pay through something like PayPal directly to you! Worth a thought?!

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    1. Where there is a will there is a way, Pam!

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  11. You never disappoint us with your imaginary post. I wish I was a better writer.

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    1. You are a gifted writer because you keep us wanting to come back and visit again and again.

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  12. Amen! Hon, people have bad taste every day of the week. That editor just had bad taste. YOU are way too amazing and witty and fantastic to work with or for someone with bad taste! I agree with Pam. Your writing rocks!

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    1. Maybe I should take up writing ON rocks, then I can throw them at anyone who doesn't like it.

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  13. Sugar you just pull up your big girl britches and get back in the saddle. Trials are carving beautiful pathways in our soul and directing us on to bigger and more authentic things! Don't ever give up on your dreams! xo
    Olivia

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    1. Wonderful advice, Olivia! I wonder if I can writer on my laptop while in that saddle? I sure will try.

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  14. LET ME AT HER!!!!!! THEM IS FIGHTIN' WORDS!!!! Perhaps Helen should've reminded you of such people like Abraham Lincoln (HOW many times did he try?), J.K. Rowling....and, you know what?! I've read your books AND they leave me wanting more!! We know where discouragement comes from, so what would Helen tell you? Yeah, that's what I thought! Hang in there, Annie....that just means that good is just around the corner!!
    xo

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    1. Thanks Holly! At some point Helen may be appearing in an ebook near you!

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    2. I'll look forward to it! ;)

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    3. I'll look forward to it! ;)

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  15. Oh- Those rejections are so painful...but you can do this- just keep at it! I had kitchen carpet in a house once (not MY choice) OMG-worse than awful! xo Diana

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    1. We had it in one of our houses - we thought it was awesome... at first. Then it was just the pits!

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  16. Carpet in the kitchen...remember it well. And the day I did actually cry over spilled milk--because it was soaking into my new kitchen carpet.

    I'm channeling my inner Scarlett as I type.

    Deb

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    1. ANYTHING spilled on Kitchen carpet was a disaster - it seemed to go away but it never really did!

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  17. Their loss, I'd read it! Don't be disheartened, you'll get there. xxx

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    1. Thanks - I guess I really need to finish writing it!

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  18. Hello!

    I'm hosting a PINK THEMED giveaway, and I would love it if you stopped by and entered your comment for a chance to win some handmade items.
    Hope to see you there!


    Ciao bella.
    Creative Carmelina

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    1. Happy Pink Saturday - coming by to see you soon.

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  19. Are you kiddin' us? ex-marine surfer dude....ahhh...sounds like a movie to us! no worries....that movie deal will be knocking at your door before ya know it :)

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  20. I shudder to think of carpet in the kitchen...Ugh. You're right, just plain nasty ever after.

    As for everything else, I appreciate this shot of perspective. Keep moving forward, keep looking up and ahead to good things. And for the record, if I start a publishing company, I WANT that series of books!

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    1. Ohh, I may hold you to that offer, Karen!

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  21. I appreciate your writing and your creative blogging as well. What about self publishing?

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    1. Thanks Jennifer - that may be what happens with this series. Right now I am still working away on this and other project. Thank you for the kind words.

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  22. I love your writing. Thanks for the laughs!

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  23. Dear Helen Hartman, You sure made my "why I am up at 5 am" moments so much easier to bear........I am sure I woke the rest of the family up laughing.... :)

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    1. Good because if mama is up and around, why should anyone else be comfy? That's my policy. Thanks for the kind words!

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  24. I cannot believe you teased and taunted us with that great story line knowing we will never get to read it. You hard hearted soul. Oh the sorrow, the tragedy!

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    1. LOL - oh, it will see the light of day - working on a follow up to something now and then Helen will cut loose and show up somewhere.

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