Wednesday, February 27, 2013

Express Yourself!


Dear Helen Hartman,
I don’t have a question I just need to say something: Gag me with a spoon!
Oh, don’t take that personally. It’s just an expression. An expression my children have forbidden me from ever uttering again. Why? Because it makes me sound stooopid. And like something that belongs in a museum. And they hate it. But I still like saying it. There. I said it. Or I will, whenever I want!

Dear Loved the 80s So Much She Never Got Over it One,

Good for you! And on those overly critical kiddos? You have Helen’s empathyMy kids also think I am a dinosaur.

To which I said - You think I'm like DINAH SHORE? WOW! I LOVE Dinah Shore.
Did they think they were dealing with an amateur at not hearing criticism? This is not my first rodeo. 

I am like the Dinah Shore of rodeos. I should have that put on a T-Shirt.

However they don’t mind it when I say old stuff, you know why?


Because they never listen to you?

Because to them I AM old and they expect me to say things like Mind Your Own Beeswax and Shut Your Cake Hole.


Oh my! You are one sassy mouthed firecracker of a dame, Helen.
Those are not expressions from my youth, I just like 'em. I think they still work. Some expressions are like that, aren't they?


Peanuts as a cost equivalent? It still works. In fact, these days some people would be glad to be paid in peanuts - it might be more practical than a paycheck.
Some expressions not so  much


Apparently there was a time when people had difficulty knowing this stuff from a less useful substance.

What my offspring really hate is when I try to use current slang.


That pot luck last night got tots cray-cray. I know Lois is one your mains but she's such a derp.
 Instagram that photobomb, K? YOLO.
I have no idea if I used any of that right. I do know that I sometimes use what I think is current only to have my son tell me "NEVER USE THOSE WORDS AGAIN."


That was like handing me a loaded bubble gun!

Of course I will do whatever my son tells me to do. NOT! (yeah, that's one dated expression I can't quit)
So my advice to you… yeah, I do realize you didn’t ask for advice, but I’m giving it anyway.


Helen drives this bus - actually she WISHES she did. Actually the person in charge in this pic isn't the driver either, so it works. When the queen is happy there is peace in the Kingdom. Or in a thrifters case - there is JUNK in the kingdom.

If you want to really irritate your kids, speak their language. Literally.

What about you, Loved Ones, are you still using an expression from your youth, or someone elses?


28 comments:

  1. Gag a maggot! Haven't said that lately. Thanks for reminding me. My family will appreciate it.

    Just so you know, if you were to put "I'm the Dinah Shore of Rodeos" on a bumper sticker, and sell it...I would soooo buy it.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I really do want something with my new motto on it. Do you think I can make a logo of Dinah Shore popping out of a rodeo clown barrel?

      Delete
  2. I'm always saying things or 'neato' or 'fab'! That probably dates me! heehee! I had Dinah Shore paperdolls...wish I knew where they were! (not knowing where things are might date me, too!) hahaha! Enjoy your day! Be COOL Dude!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Ooooo I'd love Dinah Shore paper dolls! I love paper dolls and Dinah - yes, it's official. I am old.

      Delete
  3. I say "Dude" to my friends. I know it's wrong but I just can't stop. I hate saying awesome but what else is there when something is just that, awesome??? hmmmm...

    ReplyDelete
  4. Oh I use a lot of out-dated slang all the time. 'That's cool' or 'neat' are my favorites. I also say things like 'gag me with a spoon'. LOL! I have no earthly idea what is current in slang words these days. Cool post, Helen!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thanks - The only current slang I know is cursing - it never grows old!

      Delete
  5. Such a funny post! I'll use current slang in front of my 15 year old son and he too will tell me to never do it again! HAHA! I do it just to bug him! I was a girl of the 80s so I too will use the Gag me with a spoon and Oh my GOD once in a great while-just for kicks! Love the word Awesome too!

    ReplyDelete
  6. What? Do you mean my kids and grandkids don't think I'm cool? I'm crushed. I thought I was the bees knees.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. You ARE the bees knees. I love that expression, and everyone who says it is super cool. Oh, that's another one, super cool.

      Delete
  7. My friend Jackie, up there, is always amazed at the s*@t (as opposed to Shinola) that comes out of my mouth...I think I used "cut a fat hog in the ass" the other day, with her in the car, referring to taking a short cut. AND, my stupid OLD sayings aside, the kids made the mistake of showing me a gang sign one day when they were much younger, and then were mortified when I "threw" it in the car at them, while we were driving one day - holy crap, did I get read the riot act! Needless to say, they don't show me anything anymore - YOLO! :-)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. OH no! Is gangsta still hip? Hep? Huh? Love the story.

      Delete
  8. 'Cut a rug' 'happier than a pig in mud' 'GNARLY' 'the cat's pajamas' 'RAD'....the list goes on and on. The one, however, that (totally!) drove my daughter 'bugnuts'? When I referred to a thong as 'buttfloss' and all her friends voted me the coolest Mom, like EVAR, and started saying it too.

    In fact, I ran into a couple of her friends a few weeks ago when they were out 'buttfloss' shopping...

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. HA! I love the story but I am so old I still like to think of a thong as a rubber shoe that flips and flops as you walk!

      Delete
  9. My friends tell me all the time that I must have been shot into this century by a time machine because I continue to use old, outdated phrases reaching as far back as the 1800s!!! I can't help it! Some expressions just work!!! My son gets a kick out of how I use urban vernacular when I'm trying to sound cool and hip around young people. Apparently I am unable to unload the suburban/June Cleaver accent. What's supposed to sound like, "'Sup?" invariably still sounds very much like "What's up?" I also have trouble dropping the "g" on words, so "gettin' down" comes out as "getting down" and automatically puts me in the square column. No matter...I still fancy myself the cat's pajamas no matter what those dorks say! :-)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Your both the cat's pajamas and the cat's meow!

      Delete
  10. I guess 30 years of teaching broke me of most of my slang habits, because, as you said, whether you used your own generation's slang or theirs, you lost credibility with middle school and high school kids. It was better to sound stodgy than goofy.

    I realized that in college during my hippie days when a professor who was in his 40s (and always wore a black suit and narrow tie to class, which was NOT fashionable in 1969) closed his eyes and asked, "Do you groove in the morning?" We all just looked at each other, rolled our eyes and wondered what on earth he was talking about. We never took him seriously after that.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hey, man, you groove whenever you can, right?

      Delete
  11. LOL- I refused to say Groovy even when it was Groovy to say Groovy...same thing with FAR OUT MAN! lol xo Diana

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I had forgotten about Far Out - I think I said that because when I was in Jr High I went to a John Denver concert and he said it a lot. I was one wild child.

      Delete
  12. The greatest pleasure I get from my day is accidentally-on-purpose mispronouncing slang or using in in another context "wow this tea is totally off the hook!" My life is small. Those pleasures are huge. xoxo

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. If you are having fun, then your life is bigger than most ;).

      Delete
  13. I end up saying a horrid mix of things like cool and groovy, from my wild (hah) youth, and then also use words like awesome, which just sounds ridiculous coming out of my mouth. But my girls are very nice about it ;)

    ReplyDelete
  14. We offer best νisual clarity, аs oρposеd to an avіaгy?
    We аll ԁumped our luggage and set our rhythms
    аccordingly. Thеy shoω the fаshiоn οf these glasses proѵidе.
    That's right, well, even if you are so well they don't
    hіt the bіg ѕcreen, and dоes offer рroteсtion.
    All paсkages should bе able to see
    propеrly.

    My ωebpаge - http://dawfa.com

    ReplyDelete

Loved To Have Their Own Say In Things Ones say:

LinkWithin

Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...